Why do so many of us feel alone despite success? On turning to our elders, the generational wounds that get in the way, and how to recover your inner adult by learning to feel what hurts.
Ruchika Mehta, LMFT
You want to be present. You notice your body, your feelings, your breath. And then somehow, you've disappeared into your thoughts again.
Why Can’t I Stay Present?
What if self-love isn't just how you feel about yourself, but how you stay with yourself? When you're afraid, overwhelmed, or your body tightens — do you abandon yourself, or do you stay? This is about presencing: the practice of learning to be there for yourself, through the body.
How to Be There for Yourself: Reparenting Through the Body
We all want to believe we're good people. But the harder we cling to that identity, the more disconnected we become from the parts of ourselves we've buried. What if real goodness begins when we stop pretending to be good?
Good Person Syndrome: Reclaim Your “Bad” Self
We can be surrounded by people who genuinely love us — and still feel profoundly alone. Not because something is wrong with us, but because being loved and being truly met are two different things. What happens when your soul is longing for a community that can actually meet you where you are?
Why You Can Feel Loved and Still Feel Alone
You love them. You've always loved them. So why does your own life still feel just out of reach?
How We Lose Ourselves in the Name of Love
Many South Asians in the West name what's missing as loneliness, or community, or the warmth of home. But I've come to see something else underneath all of that — a deeper missing that no external circumstance can fill. This is about the nectars, the ehsaas, the inner richness we carried in our bodies before we left — and what it takes to find our way back to it.
Nectars in the Air: What Many South Asians in the ...
Most of us blame ourselves when meditation gets hard — we think we need to practice more, try harder, do something different. But there's something else happening that nobody prepared us for. And once you see it, everything shifts.
Why does meditation sometimes feel harder?
You thought awakening would bring you closer to yourself. Instead something feels more distant. You're not failing — but something in how we think about awakening might be.
How Your Spiritual Beliefs May Be Making You Feel Disconnected ...
Are you trying to polish fake gold — or return to the real thing? A reflection on why psychospiritual work isn't about fixing your ego, but remembering who you actually are.
Real vs. Fake Gold: Are You Trying to Polish Your ...
South Asian women carry an embodied inheritance of aliveness, warmth, and connection that modern life often disconnects us from. A psychospiritual reflection on returning to the wisdom of the body.
Why South Asian Women Feel Exhausted — And the Strength ...
Whether you're on a spiritual path or not — the desire to belong and the ache of loneliness is everywhere. But what if the loneliness itself is pointing to something deeper?
Spiritual Loneliness and the Desire to Belong on the Spiritual ...
We work so hard to get relief from emotional pain — but what if the pain isn't who you are? A reflection on ego identification and what becomes possible when we return to our real selves.
Not Believing Our Thoughts and Feelings
What do you sense when you feel your body? Most of us spend our days in familiar thoughts and feelings — not realizing the body is holding everything we're not feeling. This is where healing begins.
Why Healing Lives in the Body — Not Just Your ...
No one told me that with incredible spiritual openings comes the opportunity — and the necessity — to cleanse our conditioning. Not just in the mind, but in the body. This is what integration actually means.
Coming to the Maturity of our Real Selves from the ...
What happens after the spiritual high? Most of us don't expect the contraction that follows — the wounds, the grief, the sense of losing what we just found. This is the Pendulum of Awakening, and understanding it might be the most important thing on the spiritual path.
The Pendulum of Awakening: Navigating What Comes After the Bliss
We are often taught how to function, but rarely how to live. If you feel like a 'successful' adult on the outside while feeling a quiet deficiency within, you aren't alone. Discover how Psychospiritual Integration bridges the gap between our daily lives and our real selves.
The “Missing Instructions”: Why Being a High-Functioning Adult Still Feels ...
Is it pain that brings us to spiritual practice, or is pain simply the ego's story? Explore how choosing to side with Love allows us to untangle protective patterns and return to our authentic selves.
Choosing Love is an Intention: Reframing our Path to Spiritual ...
I’ve been reflecting about this lately, especially in my work with clients. So many times, we are identified with our egos instead of our higher self – am I doing this wrong? I’m going down a rabbit hole of behaviors that aren’t serving me. I don’t know how to make decisions. […]
Aligning to our Higher Self
The soul does not always speak loudly. Sometimes it is simply a whisper in the quiet of the night — a gentle invitation to turn back toward our center.
Whispers of the Soul
You've been on a spiritual path. You've had real openings. So why do you feel more anxious, exhausted, or lost than before? If your spiritual awakening left you struggling rather than at peace — you might need support that understands both the spiritual and the psychological.
Is It My Mental Health or a Spiritual Awakening?
When spiritual growth deepens, our oldest wounds often surface to be healed. This is the heart of psychospiritual integration—the process of untangling the ego's protective patterns so we can finally 'click' into our lives and embody the peace, love, and presence we have cultivated.
What is Psychospiritual Integration?
We are not the waves in the ocean. We are the ocean itself. When we stop identifying with our egos, we can dip into who we really are – our Beings. We are not our thoughts or feelings or sensations. Spiritual practices involve taming our egos and building inner resources. When […]
Connecting with our Being to untangle our ego and pains
Navigate your spiritual awakening safely with these three essential pillars: Embodiment, the Inner Teacher, and Good Intentions. Learn how to stay grounded as deep wounds arise and how to differentiate soul-wisdom from ego-resistance.
3 Foundational Ingredients for a Safe Spiritual Awakening Journey
Our deepest trauma is often not only what happened to us, but what we lost of ourselves in the process. Explore dissociation, soul loss, and the path of reclaiming the self.
Our Deepest Trauma Isn’t What Happened to Us — It’s ...
We live in a profound homelessness, deep loneliness, whether consciously or not. We do our best to fill it. But somehow the feeling doesn’t get filled. Covered over – yes. We don’t understand why. We try and try and try to understand, to fill. And a part of us goes […]
Holy City – Support for our Souls or Un-Holy City
Many seekers reach a point where magical thinking no longer satisfies. Discover how to bridge the gap between devotional presence and embodied knowledge to find your own inner guide.
From Seeker to Guide: Insights on Spiritual Growth and Healing
Today I was reflecting about why do we engage in meditation or spiritual practices. Not everyone, but many come to spirituality from a place of pain or struggle. In fact, often struggle or pain presents an opportunity and hope to change the direction of our lives. We become motivated to […]
Is Struggle a Spiritual Gift? Rethinking Failure, Pain, and the ...
These days we are faced even more with our fear of dying. It could be we are feeling it consciously. Or it could be that we just aren’t feeling like ourselves. We may be feeling more anxious, overwhelmed, unable to settle, scared, depressed. How do we remember to lean in […]
Using Fear of Dying as an opportunity to Lean into ...
As an empath, I sometimes struggle to speak my truth in relationships. I’m aware that speaking up means conflict. Though my adjustment seems outwardly seamless, I noticed in recent relationship dynamics that I was trying to numb myself with unhealthy foods. Subsequent to a period of days of avoiding speaking […]
Purpose of Pain
Recent events have me thinking about the fires and hurricanes, calamities of nature. Also, thinking of the masculine and feminine, power and pain that also is coming up to be healed. I’m feeling my heart that seems solid and in some ways being a witness as my own process is […]
Outer Calamities and Inner Quandaries
2 Dating as a conscious woman comes with its own perks and challenges. So many women on the spiritual path struggle with the feeling of divide between their spiritual path and dating. This sense of divide is real in many aspects. Often, we aren’t exposed to dating and relationships models that […]
Conscious Woman Dating
There is a myth in our culture that we need to effort to become better people. Or better workers. Or have better relationships. Essentially, many of us don’t feel worthy or good enough, giving rise to numerous self help programs for low self-esteem. We can also become attached to our […]
The Self Improvement Myth
Spiritual teachings often speak about the importance of sangha or soul family. There seem to be more and more young people negotiating being in this world with their gifts and a connection with the divine that is more organic, rather than seeking the divine through pain and experiencing contrast. Others […]
Significance of Our Soul Family
We live in a culture where we are all in ‘pursuit of happiness’. The subtle and powerful beliefs we hold is that if we’re not happy, then something is wrong. It is acceptable in our culture to have moments of grief or sadness, however these feelings are expected to […]
The Value of Grief
As I stay awake in bed in the morning, I “see” a prickly surrounding to my entire body. I know that this prickly surrounding is a constant in my experience. It is an inner dialogue that is relentlessly judging and attempting to control my inner experience through disapproval. I spend […]
Balancing the Wings of Love
Sometimes spiritual circles exalt themes of journeying alone. It is said that our journey ultimately take us to places where it is just us and the Divine. For me, this brings up images of awakening while meditating in a cave up on top of a mountain. There are underlying themes […]
The Gift of Loneliness
Many of us are instinctively afraid of our deepest inner longings. How do we transform this hunger into food for our souls? I’ve been feeling really hungry lately. It feels like a mixed blessing, as I open up to my dreams and fantasies, my desire to play, and increased […]
Insatiable Hunger and Fullness
Happy 2017! On the last day of 2016, I attended a delicious meditation that was about what I wanted 2017 to be about. I got to sink into and connect into what essence or quality I wanted to experience or have more of in 2017. It was easy, as the […]
Focusing on What You Want in the New Year
Longing for community can really be up for us at this time of the year. Feelings of loneliness arise, whether we are surrounded with people or if we choose to spend the time more quietly. Though feelings of loneliness can feel especially heightened during this time, these feelings can […]
Longing for Community
2 Last summer I toured with Amma, the incarnate Divine Mother, through most of the United States. Steeped in that incredible energy and connection, my prayer during that time with her was to be guided in my life. During that time I felt like I only needed to know the […]
Separation and Connection with the Divine
I sit in a daze. My mind is racing and it is challenging to stay present in my body. My sacrum is tense, and I feel better leaving my body. Instead of the usual uplifting and inspiring messages I see on Facebook feed, it is filled with election responses from […]
Navigating Energetically Challenging Times
2 “I wish I could show you when you are lonely or in the darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.” – Hafiz As I grapple lately with increased feelings of uncertainty, I notice a quiet terror building internally. In response, I find myself grasping to hold on to […]
Uncertainty and Allowing
I’ve been having a lot of juicy conversations lately about relationships. It’s magical for two people to choose to be in relationship together and to continue to choose it over the long term in a way that feels authentic and truly satisfying. After all, we experience our deepest vulnerabilities […]
Moving from Struggle to Finding the One with Joy
On collective and individual levels lately, there are many tumultuous feelings. We may be feeling like we’re up against strong internal programs and patterns. Because they’re so well practiced and strong, it can be challenging in those moments to connect with the greater truth. At the same time, just a moment […]
Tumultuous Times and Having a Vision
I’ve been thinking about vulnerability a lot lately. Recently, I had a really fun experience. I felt connected to community, feeling expansive beyond my norm with both known and unknown people. I also felt pain about the parts of me that shrink, that don’t quite open up. I woke up […]
Vulnerability and Love
At a training today, I was so surprised to hear that safety is not a need. When our needs are met, feelings of safety arise. Are you as surprised to hear this as I was? In our day to day lives, we encounter places where we don’t feel safe. Something […]
Feeling Empowered in Our Lives
Transformation is a messy path. You will be raw. You will feel vulnerable. You will feel discomfort. There will be times when you feel immense rage. Moreover, there will be times when you feel as though there is no ground to support you as old ways leave and new ones […]
The Path of Transformation
The group meditation this week was Soul Linking. I felt deeply honored and my heart felt full with everyone’s presence, sharing, openness, and bringing themselves so fully to the experience. Soul Linking meditation supports connecting with others on the soul level, whether we want to increase love in our relationships, allow the […]
Connecting with Departed Souls and Healing
2 Fear is a big driver and is taking control these days. My Facebook feed is full of fear about elections and managing fear or making the best choices we can. Plenty of people are feeling powerless and enraged. Quoting Abraham-Hicks “Isn’t it an interesting thing, a whole bunch of you […]
Expanding from Fear to Desire
2 I remember living in a magical universe. No one taught me that it was magical; some part of me just knew that there is a real, living relationship between this universe and me. In this relationship, I show up with my open, innocent heart, asking repeatedly for what I want. […]
Reconnecting to a Magical Universe
4 I’m feeling infuriated. No matter how much I try to communicate with another person that she is not hearing me and responding to me, she is struggling to get it. For the most part, this is a person who has actually been quite closely in tune with my communication, both […]
Understanding Projections and Surviving Them
In a recent sharing, I discussed an inner process where I connected utilizing my ego defenses in one area of my life and how it was affecting my life globally. The saying goes “how do you something is how you do everything”. I find it to be often true, though […]
Shifting to Essential Structures
Sometimes I go through an experience, and simultaneously the witness internally is wondering if I’m experimenting. It is so interesting to watch. There are times when I consciously choose to experiment, or in my language “play”, with something. There are other times, however, when there is some kind of experience […]
Are you a Martyr?
4 I used to breeze past the subject of forgiveness. Then I realized that freeing myself from painful relationship patterns meant something I hadn't fully understood before: learning not to take on another person's projections, and healing what had been harmed in me.
Forgiveness, blah or something else?
This is the crucial time to pay attention to our mindset to attract what we want and create the life we want! I’m there. I’m really there. I’ve decided I want life to mirror myself as I am, effortlessly. In fact, I’ve been refusing to step into something that just […]
Going into the Darkness
When I was in my early 20s, someone came into my life for a short period of time, a person I felt connected with instantaneously and we could talk for hours and all night. He tried really hard to convince me that I was lovable and that my happiness and […]
How I Moved From Feeling Unlovable To Basking In Love
Earlier this year, my job as a psychotherapist had gotten very stressful, with mounting paperwork and tight deadlines. I felt like I needed to continue working at my job, fearing what would happen if I quit — losing my income, would I go homeless? Going homeless had been my recurring […]